Why?

As a third grade teacher, I spend a lot of time teaching about cause/effect relationships.  I have found that one of the hardest concepts for my students to grasp, is figuring out the "why" in the relationship-what caused something to happen...especially when it isn't mapped out clearly for them.

In reality, that's humanity in a nutshell...we want to know why things happen and we want it to make sense, but often it doesn't...especially when it isn't something that we wanted to happen to us.

Do you ever find yourself asking why?  What did I do to deserve this?  Why do bad things happen to good people?  Why God?  Why me?

It can cause frustration, depression, anger, hostility, fear...

It can consume our thoughts and drive us batty when there isn't an answer.

When my son died, I had a really hard time with this.  I was angry.  Disappointed in God and confused as to why my prayers weren't answered.  Why was Miles dealt that life and not given a chance to be here on the earth, to experience everything that a good life had to offer.  What was the cause of such heartache and pain for myself as a mother?  What good did it do the rest of my family to have to go through all that?  What was the cause?

I still don't have an answer to why that had to happen, and I don't have the answer to what caused something bad to happen to you.

But I have learned something huge through all the bad things that have happened to me in my life, a different outlook that I want to share...

I challenge all of you to stop thinking of whatever you are struggling with as the effect.  Stop looking for a cause of what happened to you.  Stop asking God why...

...and trust.

Because what we do know is that God holds you close and He won't ever let you go.

What if...go with me for a minute...what if that horrible thing that happened to you, or that is happening to you isn't the EFFECT, but instead it is the CAUSE.  That there isn't a why to what is happening to you, but instead that God will use what is happening to you to be the "why" for an effect that He is starting IN you.

The truth is that He isn't up there making bad things happen to you, but He is there to see you through them, and He can turn anything in your life into something good for you-the one He loves.

This thought makes me breathe deep and relax...and I let go and trust that He won't let go.  That, in fact, He is in control.

I was blessed by my son in my life.  And in hindsight, I can see the change God made in me as He helped me get through the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.  I am stronger as a person.  I am more patient and compassionate as a human being.  I am more savoring and in-the-moment as a mother.  I am more appreciative as a wife and daughter.  I am more loving.  God didn't cause my hardship, but He did use my hardship to cause a change in me...to mold me into who He wants me to be...and He continues to do this with every struggle I face in life.

In this imperfect world, you cannot escape pain...but you CAN stop asking why, and trust that God will not only see you through, but use whatever you are going through to make you stronger.  You will be the planned effect.  So stop trying to make sense of something that is bigger than any of us can comprehend...let go...and trust the one who made you, the one who holds you close and holds your future, to make an effect in you.